Random complaints

I'm distraught. I have no idea of what the hell is going on. Are we staying in TN in our lovely new home or will we be packing up all our crap (hey, didn't we just do that last weekend?) and moving back to CA or will we just sell all our belongings on e-bay, start a cult in Mexico and steal rich, impressionable college students' parents' money until we have enough to move to Fiji?

I'm stuck in a lackluster job whereby common phrases include, "Wanna supersize that handle? Need screws with that?" And at the watercooler we all comment on "Bubbles" the newest Rhesus Monkey to answer phones, enter orders, and toss his own $@#!% around like he owns the place. He's quite disturbing, but in such a cute way that we've all forgiven him and instead beg him to not throw his feces in our general direction. He's rather obliging which I'm thankful for. Yeah Bubbles. Wait, there's no Bubbles at work... damn, too little sleep and too much stress makes for a bad combo.

School sucks. Normally I like learning and all the crap that goes along with it, but right now I just want to the class to end. I think it's over as of tonight. How would I know, the instructor still hasn't contacted me to let me know if I passed Tuesday's night exam or if I need to retake it on the 17th.

Tonight's exam for Torts was tedious and poorly written. That particular instructor was almost worthless. She started off with such a bang, we were so excited, then the last two classes she found the time to teach she flew through and we were out of our 3 hour long class in less than an hour. Of the 8 classes she was paid to teach she made it to 4, well, 2 if consider that the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th classes TOGETHER barely lasted 3 hours total. That's just not right.

The books suck also. Typos, errors, lame examples, etc. What the hell did I pay all that moola for? Especially if I can't put the stupid UT Certificate to use in TN. If you're not a local, don't have a "Daddy" and didn't go to UT you may as well just hitch-hike it to anywhere but East TN cause they sure don't want "ya'll" here. Yes, yes, I'm told the UT Paralegal Certificate is good anywhere in the US, but really, really good here. Hopefully CA will accept it. Assuming that's where we end up, which it's looking more and more likely each day.

Drivers in TN struggle. Last night on my way home from work a woman was in the right hand lane of Broadway. Her car was askew, as if she had at one point intended to merge into the left hand lane, then thought better of it, and instead decided to just stop right there. Her car did not appear to have any damage. In fact, she seemed to be balancing her check book. Granted traffic was bumper-to-bumper on Broadway so sitting around waiting for it to abate isn't the worst idea, but.... anyway, all the cars in the right hand lane were passing her as she sat idly by subtracting her $129.76 bouffant hair appointment from her checking account. Lady, get a freakin' move on or pull off to the shoulder. What, do you have Bubbles @#!% for brains? Of course she does, why do I ask?

While I may be down on school I am bummed that UT isn't an option at this time, nor any time in the near future. That bites... my future just looks stinkin' bleak. Sure I'm in a pissy mood and not truly considering that I'm just plain wrong, that the future can be bright - whatever. It sure doesn't seem like it at the moment. So, if you have a problem with it, #%^&*! off. I don't care. I just want to wallow in my red wine and drool, while Karma eats the cat shit from the litter box. Darn dog, if I've told her once I've told her a gazillon times, "Save some for Sassy!" O.k., so I don't really say that, though I should cause it's true. Darn dogs just aren't happy unless they're dining on Ginger's & Jordan's waste. Yum, talk about appetizing. Sick little puppies.

Oh goody, white-trash neighbor with tinted windows on his VERY loud car just got home. Could his car be any louder?

Screw it, I'm stick of trying to make my fumbling fingers type any more crap. If you're still reading this clearly your life sucks as bad as mine. I pity you dude, I truly do. Go find something productive to do - like hey, maybe you could make up a story about a jobless monkey with BIG hair named Bubbles that eats cat shit, writes poorly, doesn't show up to class, and drives as if all the world was one big bumper-car course.

Clean phone, pissy floor

The move, school, work, visiting family, etc. have finally taken their toll. I accidentally washed my cell phone. It's now very clean, but worthless as anything more than a paperweight. In its place I have a spiffy camera phone, complete with photos of hubby and critters. Speaking of critters... after class tonight I arrived home later than usual (around 8:00 pm). I let the dogs stay in today instead of kicking their furry little butts to the fenced-in yard as I typically do. I did originally put them outside but they both really, really, really, really wanted in. Big dopey sad eyes, whining, pawing at the door, the works. I caved. My reward for being such a nice dog mommy, that's right a BIG POND of PISS on the kitchen floor. Yes, I'm very grateful it was on the linoleum and not the carpet.

And like you, I too thought, "swell, I can use the new camera phone to take a picture of the offending puddle." Don't worry I didn't actually do it. That's just gross. Bad enough I had to clean it up.

I Don't Want to Say Goodbye

For the past week my mom has been staying with the hubby and me. She's helped paint our new home, provided moral support, and has been a best friend.

When I was a child I NEVER considered her a friend - she was mean! But, fortunately for my mom and me adulthood allowed both of us to foster a new relationship that is based less on authority and more on mutual interests.

Don't get me wrong mom will always be a "mom" but now that I'm more grown up we're able to laugh and enjoy each other's company. Most of this past week all we did was laugh. I don't even recall what the hell was so funny but something sure was cause we were giggling constantly. I'm really going to miss that.

Painting the house isn't exactly the most exciting way to spend time but with mum it was certainly more enjoyable than if I had slapped paint on the walls all by my lonesome. We listened to Jack FM (which mom insists is JackAss FM), we frequented Dunkin' Donuts more often than my waistline approves of, zipped all around town locating the perfect drapes/curtains/rods/etc. for each room, and just had a whopper of a good time.

It was like the old days when I still lived in Wisconsin. She and I would either redecorate a room or two in her house or maybe jazz up my place. That's something we've both always enjoyed.

We both also like antiques so we visited the Dutch Valley Antique Mall and browsed up and down the numerous isles laughing, at what???? I haven't a clue but it sure was funny at the time!

Being off work was great but being off work and being able to spend that time with someone I truly love and respect was the best holiday gift I received.

I'm gonna miss ya mom and I don't want to say goodbye.

How do I spell STRESS?

J-u-s-t-k-i-l-l-m-e-n-o-w

A-q-u-i-c-k-b-l-o-w-t-o-t-h-e-h-e-a-d-w-i-t-h-a-h-e-a-v-y-b-l-u-n-t-o-b-j-e-c-t

A-r-s-e-n-i-c-a-n-d-h-e-m-l-o-c-k-c-o-c-k-t-a-i-l

There are plenty of ways... of course living in TN the locals prefer to induce stress and it's wonderful side-effects by:

• pulling funding a week before a home closing
• having the second lending company claim they're having a "computer glitch" 2 days before the home closing thereby NOT providing any information to me or the title company
• second lending company say, "We need ANOTHER appraisal" before we'll lend to you, cause the one we already paid for apparently isn't good enough
• delaying the home closing by 4 days, thus screwing up the seller's move out schedule so he's still living there

And my personal favorite:

• canceling the homeowner's insurance BEFORE the closing but having the notice delivered to the house I don't yet own, so I don't receive the notice until $^&*!@#% Christmas Eve - when, by the way, the seller was kind enough to let us stop by to show the place off to the in-laws and thus provide us with the happy news of "You're SCREWED - AGAIN!" via sealed letter. No Mr. Insurance Agent, please don't call us with this type of news as we'd prefer to get it in a letter 8 days before the insurance expires.

Happy Holidays!

Now where the hell is my hemlock?

It was worth it!

Thursday night we had dinner at our wonderful friends' home. Pam, Andrew & Abby invited us over a fabulous home cooked meal of ham, potatoes, yams, casserole, dinner rolls, excellent red wine, and an assortment of desserts. It was all so delicious - well, I assume the desserts were, I was too full to try them!!! Me?! I don't know how that's even possible, but it happened.

We had so much fun we didn't leave until Friday! We made it back to the Estate a little after 4:00 am. Unfortunately I couldn't sleep so most of the day on Friday I was out of it. But, that's o.k., spending time with Pam & Andrew is always worth it!

Ugh

We did NOT close on the house. Our original lender bailed on us, the 2nd lender claimed to be experiencing a computer glitch and as such could not provide the title company with the necessary documents for us to close.

The broker we've been using, who up until this week has been very friendly and helpful, was completely useless. When I asked the broker what the new loan terms were he didn't have a clue. I'm not willing to sign a 30-year mortgage (hell, I don't even know if it is a 30-year mortgage?!) without knowing the total amount, interest rate, what our monthly payments will be, etc.

This whole process has been a major misfire and I've had it. As far as I'm concerned GAME OVER.

I'm fed up with the incompetence in TN, it's intrusive and has invaded almost every area of my life:

• Work - it's especially prevalent at work. In fact due to my wonderful employer that's how this whole darn mess with the house began!
• Driving - most people in TN struggle to stay in their own lane, and don't even ask them to make a right hand turn without coming to a full and complete stop. They just are not capable of such a thing, they may spill their beer - gasp!
• Banking - if you plan on opening up a bank account in TN and use a cashier's check to fund the new account, be prepared to have a hold put on the cashier's check for at least 5 days. That's right, they don't trust it - even if it's from another institution from just down the freakin' street.

I don't have the energy to list all the various examples. I'm just too disgusted about the whole dang thing.

Too many freakin' passwords!

I've got too many freakin' passwords and it's pissin' me off.

I was locked out of my work computer this morning because yesterday I received the official "time to change your password - AGAIN" message. So I did as directed and modified the stupid thing so I wouldn't forget it. However, there is a complex screen with 33 bazillion check boxes for various programs - some of which should be checked, some should not be, some are only checked on odd days, others on days when the moon is full, some boxes are checked when it's raining and more than 52 degrees Fahrenheit but less than 57 degrees ... I of course either checked one I wasn't supposed to or failed to uncheck a box. Who knows, hell who cares, all I know is that I had to call India to get the damn thing fixed because the computer was screaming "Denied! DENIED! No access for you foolish moron. That's right you're SOL, up the creek, fishing without a pole..."

This morning "Nikki" (a.k.a. Ms. India who selected an American name for idiots like me to be able to pronounce) got me all hooked up again, but it took over 30 minutes. Granted it was company time so no biggie but still annoying. Maybe next week when the same damn thing happens I'll get to speak to Rambo.

Anyway, just for work alone I have over 7 different passwords for various programs and network crap. In my personal life I can't even add up the number of passwords I have for everything from e-mail to Amazon.com to Travelocity to online banking, this blog, etc. etc..... the list is endless. And of course it never fails that each vendor/system has different password requirements so ONE master password just isn't possible. I realize having ONE master password pretty much defeats the purpose of having a password... but what good are all the dang passwords if I get locked out and can't access the junk I need?

Lancaster here we come...?

Our broker called yesterday to say that the lender who promised to finance our mortgage is bailing out and using my employer as the reason. I have no idea if the company I work for just screwed me over, did me a big favor, or if the lender (OptionOne) is just messed up. So, the broker dude is working hard to find a new lender since we close on the house in 7 days!!!!

If we are unable to secure new financing before the 16th of Dec. and if Erik is unable to secure gainful employment soon we may move to Lancaster.

However, if we can make a go of things here in Knoxhell that would be great as I could then finish my degree in 2006 at UT and not have to wait a year (or more) in CA to apply for in-state tuition.

I don't even have the energy to be upset about this. I'm not sure it's even worth getting upset. Whatever happens will happen. We'll make the most of it or we won't. I'll just put off worrying till later cause I don't want to waste time thinking about the "what ifs."

Part of me would LOVE to move back to CA. Part of me wants to stay here. Since I'm undecided I figure no sense investing any time thinking about either until I know which I must consider. Of course, I write this after having done nothing but think about it! Now I'm all thought out.

University of Tennessee

On July 3, 2005 I applied to UT as a transfer student. I forgot I applied, then the week before the deadline (late October) I called to follow-up since I never received anything as noted in the application instructions.

During the follow-up phone call I learned that UT needed my high school transcripts?! (Huh? Id' been out of high school over 14 years?! And, I don't recall the application instructions saying anything about high school transcripts for transfer students.) I contacted both the high schools I had attended and requested they forward my transcripts to UT.

I assumed that since I was down to the wire and with only a week's time to fulfill UT's requirements that I did not make the deadline and I would need to wait until the summer or fall session to re-apply. Fortunately I was wrong have been accepted for the Spring 2006 session.

Now I have to hope and pray that UT accepts most of my transfer credits. If they do I should only need to attend 1 full-time semester to graduate. However, as my buddy Pam is discovering, UT doesn't seem to approve of many courses/credits earned elsewhere.

I'm excited about finally finishing my B.S. but nervous about how it'll all work out. The timing is what it is... but with the new house, Erik losing his job, me finishing up the Paralegal Program and wanting to look for employment as a paralegal instead of continuing to be a phone-drone, and of course all the additional costs associated with each of these endeavors (as well as the holidays?!) I'm just a tad stressed.

At this point I don't see my being a full-time student as an option until the hubby has secured gainful employment that can support us. I don't mind going part-time to school and working part-time... I just hope I find the right balance to make the two happen. At least the move to the new house will put me closer to school and downtown.

Nickel Creek Dream Come True

Early on Thanksgiving before Pam and Andrew arrived I mentioned to the hubby that I secretly hoped they would bring Nickel Creek's new CD "Why Should the Fire Die?" I just wanted to check it out cause I thought I might like it.

The music Gods smiled upon me and before I knew it we were lip-smacking the turkey and listening to the smooth tunes of said band. Sure enough, I like the CD. Perhaps a brand spanking new CD will find its way into my stocking this year? I've been good... really. Just ask the cats.